Sarah Bits
by Edna Pests
Summary: A collection of scattered scenes from Sarah the Time Lady's life.
1. Secrets

"I will ask you one more time, _Sarah_," Kirk's voice spoke distaste for her alias. "state your race and identity. That's an-"

"Order?" She raised an eyebrow in a Spockish manner. "Last I checked, orders were only for members of your crew." Her voice softened. "Come on, captain. I was just getting to like you three. Can't you give me a bit of trust, and let me keep my secrets to myself?"

"Those who withhold their identity generally have a criminal background." Spock said.

"I _do _have a criminal past, and you know it. But that's not why I'm staying tightlipped."

"Then _why_?" asked McCoy, frustrated.

"If I told you why it would defeat the whole purpose."

"Spock," Kirk said grimly. "find out who she is?"

"And how exactly is he going to do that?" asked Sarah. "Even if I could be looked up, we don't exactly have any computers here."

They were in a fire lit cave, where they had taken refuge from the daleks. Suddenly Sarah realized what Kirk was referring to.

She sprang to her feet. "Oh no, I don't think so. Come on! That's an invasion of privacy, a breach of cognitive personal space!"

Heedless to her words Spock was approaching, eyes locked on hers. Her race was immune to Vulcan hypnotism, though. She made a run for it, but she wasn't faster than him. Before Sarah knew what had happened, she was pinned against the rock wall.

"Now, just a warning, though I know you won't listen," she said. His hand was already on the central katra points of her face. "I have strength in the psychic department. If you go in I will push you out-"

Everything swam out of focus. There was only her mind, her thoughts, her memories...

Oh, and him. She let him see her most recent recollections, made him think he was winning, made him let down his guard. Then she pushed hard. Pushed him out of her mind and into his.

Her sight returned. Spock fell backwards, pain almost registering on his face.

"Sorry." She reached out a hand to help him up. "I did warn you-"

"Don't touch him." McCoy shoved his way in front, and bent down by Spock. He took out a medical instrument, and started scanning with it. Kirk glared at Sarah.

"Don't look at me like it's _my_ fault!" she said. Spock had recovered, and stood up. Sarah felt the new veil of distrust between her and them. "Look, if you want my help you'll have to accept a few things. I don't hide this information for selfish gain. I hide it to keep others safe."

"_Life forms_ _detected_." a dalek said, just outside the cave mouth. "_Preparing to exterminate!_"

Sarah turned to her friends, and said her new favorite word. "Run!"


	2. Don't I Know You?

_Regeneration- Second Sarah_

_Disclaimer- When Sarah is thinking, talking, or being talked to that's me. All the other dialogue is from the Santa Clause movie from Disney._

Sarah had been thrown into the Time Winds. She kept a firm grip on her communicator, so she could call the Enterprise to come when she landed. That is, assuming the landing place was somewhere the communicator would work.

The travel wasn't painful, just very disorienting. There was no way to tell which was up and which was down. A colorful pattern would grab her attention, suck her into it, and then another pattern would do the same. And to move her it seemed the Winds had to become a part of her. It got into the blood, and the mind.

_Is this how being drunk feels like?_, she wondered. Abruptly everything stopped moving. She was lying on something cold and hard. Above was the night sky. But something seemed wrong with it. There were odd ribbons of color mingling with the stars.

_The Northern Lights_, her mind supplied helpfully. This must be in the Arctic. Sarah stood up, got extremely dizzy, and fell back down. The effect of the Time Winds was still heavily in effect. The communicator had been smashed on a piece of ice. She tucked the remains in her pocket.

It took several moments before she spotted the giant hole in the ice. She crawled up to it. Inside there were so many colors she almost thought there were more Time Winds. But it turned out to be a lot of small people, dressed in colorful clothes. And there was a sleigh on a circle of ice, with a boy inside it.

Sarah got excited. Had she stumbled on to the place? The Time Lady stood up. Bad move. She overbalanced, and fell in. Air and colors flew past. She tucked in her legs and rolled as she hit the floor, so the landing didn't hurt as much. No doubt about it. This was the Workshop.

"Are you okay?" asked the kid in the sleigh.

"Oh yes." she assured him. The words came out slurred. Ahead was a girl elf having a heated discussion with tall, thin man in a red suit. Sarah stumbled in their direction. Someone bumped into her, also heading towards the two.

"Excuse me." he said.

"Why? Did you fart?" But he had already moved on.

"Hey!" he said, hands on his hips. "Who's causin' all the trouble around here?"

"He is!" "She is!"

"Excuse me," he said to the girl. "are we on a coffee break?"

"We don't drink coffee."

"Then I guess the break is over! Back to work. Thanks."

"Take it easy on her, will ya?" said the grown-up. "Who are you?"

"I'm Bernard."

Sarah burst out laughing.

The elf turned. "_What_?"

"Nothing, nothing. I suppose it can be pronounced that way too. ...Hey, did you ever break into my house when I was a kid?"

Bernard blinked. "...Not that I'm aware of."

Sarah blanked out for the next few moments as a wave of pain hit her. She vaguely remembered the grown-up saying something about shoving a sea kayak down a chimney. The elf seemed to think she was a friend of the new Santa, and the new Santa thought she was a friend of the elves. When focus returned, the kid from the sleigh had walked up to the three of them.

"Who's this?" asked Bernard. His voice had been harsh before, but now it was softening.

"This is my son, Charlie." The grown-up put a hand on the kid's shoulder. "Charlie, this is buh- beh-"

"Bernard." Sarah said helpfully.

Charlie reached out a hand cautiously. "Hi, Bernard."

The elf shook it. "Hiya, sport."

Sarah smiled.

"Hey, Dad!" Charlie said. "He called me 'sport', just like you!"

"Wonderful." the grown up said sarcastically.

"Hey, you know what?" said Bernard. "I got somethin' for you. Now hold out your hand, alright?"

The new Santa groaned at the cheesiness, and went to lean on a door labeled Ballroom. Bernard took a gleaming snow globe out of his bag.

"Now be careful." He handed it to Charlie. "This is very old, just like me. Shake it up, Charlie."

Sarah giggled. "That sounds like a name for a disco album."

Charlie shook it gently. The globe showed a small sleigh, descending into a picturesque little town. Apparently someone had manipulated the elemental atoms to psychically tune in to the mind set of the viewer. A.K.A., you could only see if you believed. Figuring this out made Sarah's Wind drugged head hurt.

"Woah."

"Why don't you, uh, hold on to it for me for a while?" said Bernard. "It might come in handy."

"Thanks." said Charlie, completely awed. "Thanks a lot. I promise I'll take real good care of it."

"Make _sure_ that you do."

"I will." He went to show it to his dad. Sarah smiled at the elf.

"What?" he said.

"You're sweet with children." she informed him.

"Hey, Barabbas-" The grown-up began.

"_Bernard_." Sarah and Bernie said together.

"Whatever. Can we take a direct flight back to reality, or do we have to change planes in Denver?"

Bernard ignored him. "Larry," he said to a passing elf. "take Charlie here and get him some chow."

At the word chow Sarah's stomach rumbled. She hadn't eaten in two days. So she followed Larry too.

"Hello." Sarah said, catching up with him and Charlie. "So, I was wondering-"

"Who are you?"

"I'm Sarah. Well, I call myself Sarah. My real name is too Gallifreyan to just toss it around."

Larry's eyes widened. "You're a Time Lady? But we lost contact with your people years ago! We thought you were all dead."

"We are." Any emotion was forced back. "I survived because I was on a starship when the daleks attacked."

"You've ridden in a spaceship?" Charlie said, his eyes growing wide. "How far?"

"Oh, across the universe and back." she said casually.

Larry took them to the kitchens. Inside they saw all manner of sweets being made, such as gingerbread houses, cookies, hot cocoa, eggnog, candy canes, and every other Christmas food you can think of. Apparently the elves had known they were coming, because three plates of turkey, mashed potatoes, corn, and a bit of cranberry sauce were set out , along with three cups of eggnog. Sarah didn't normally like eggnog, but the Workshop's version was delicious. She left with a full belly.

_Surely there must be a laboratory around here_, she thought, _where they invent new toys_. The elves seemed kinder to than they were to the new Santa, and they pointed out the right direction. There were all kinds of machines there. Some she recognized, some she didn't. She set her communicator down on one of the tables, planning to come and fix it later. Now it was time to find Bernard and Santa. They were in the busiest part of the Workshop. The Head Elf looked tired and frustrated. Santa looked uncooperative. She ran up to them, just as Bernard shouted, "TRY TO UNDERSTAND THIS!"

Santa jumped.

"Ooo-ooh!" chorused the elves.

"Dude." said Sarah. "Calm down. Take a deep breath."

Bernie inhaled deeply, then plastered a smile on his face, and chuckled exasperatedly. He grabbed Santa gently by the arm, and pulled him along. "Let me explain something to you, okay? Toys have to be delivered. I'm not gonna do it. It's not my job. I'm just an elf. It's Santa's job, but Santa fell off a roof; _your_ roof. You read the card, you put on the suit, that _clearly_ falls under the Santa Clause," He stopped walking, the frustrated look back on his face. "so now you're Santa, okay?"

"A question." said Santa.

"_What_?"

"When can I get outta here?"

Suddenly Sarah's brow furrowed in pain. "Bugger."

"Are you alright?" asked Bernard."How did you get here, anyway?"

"I took a little spin on the Time Winds."

"The Time what?" asked Santa.

"Dr. Hismus!" Bernard called.

A smartly dressed elf popped out from the crowd. "Yes, sir?"

"Take...I'm sorry, what's your name?"

"Sarah."

"Nice to meet you, Sarah. Hismus, take her to the elfirmary and treat her for Time Wind travel."

"This way, Time Lady." Hismus said. She followed, her mind wandering. What if the communicator was never fixed? What if she never got back to the Enterprise? She looked back at Bernard. He radiated authority, had a good heart, and genuinely cared about his fellow workers. A lot like her. She knew he would get her home.


	3. Baseball or Timetravel?

_Regeneration: First Sarah_

_Place: Camp, Earth, twenty-first century._

"Excuse me?"

She looked up. It was a human, male, one of the caretakers. Sarah guessed he was about thirty.

"Yes?"

"Are you one of the sponsors? I haven't seen you before."

"That's because I don't stay in one place very long." She looked at the sky, hoping he would leave is she ignored him. The wind had the toasted smell of summer. Tree branches with ultra green leaves swayed. Teenagers ran about, giggling or making fun of each other. He was still there.

"Look," Sarah said. "I'm an alien. I was thrown back in time by a freak fracture in the fabric of reality. My friends in their spaceship can't help. I need to concentrate to think of a way to reopen the portal so I can leave this primitive, hormone fueled environment, and it _would_ help, it _really_ would, if I didn't have to deal with a slightly balding human burbling about sponsors!"

He smiled, and laughed. After working around teenagers, who made jokes out of anything, he supposed this was a joke too.

"I _so _know someone you should meet." he said. "She's into science fiction too."

Sarah sighed. "Spare me the annoyance." She walked off, in a very bad mood. Teens were playing baseball nearby. They had to wait in line for their turn. One girl was writing in a small notepad, and kept moving to the end of the line so she'd never have to play. Sarah could see why. The writer was chubby, had no muscle, and would probably embarrass herself in any physical activity. Getting bored, Sarah decided to talk to her."Like writing, do you?"

"Yeah."

"Not one for sports?"

"Yeah."

"Good at anything?"

She saw the writer's shoulders sag a little. Obviously of the aggravating type that had no self esteem. "Not much."

"Shame."

"Yeah."

"Maybe you could be an author."

"Maybe."

"Great conversationalist, you are." Sarah said sarcastically.

"Sorry." The writer looked up from her notebook. It can't be said why, but it was a very lucky chance. "What's that?"

Sarah looked too. It was a hazy patch. If you looked straight at it, all else would be distorted. She grinned, her mood brightening.

"That's my way home. Look, I'm sorry if I was rude before." Before the writer could answer, she ran off. The human watched. When the haze and Sarah collided, both vanished. The writer's mouth dropped open. Along walked a human male, from before.

"What's so interesting?" he asked.

The writer's mouth closed. "Nothing, nothing. Just thinking."

"Then choo-choo. We have a game to play."

Trying not to groan, she took her place at the base.


End file.
